Today is my last day of taking the clomid....I am thankful for that. Since the RE has upped the dosage of my clomid, it has made me very irritable, fatigued, emotional and very headachy. I’m hoping after today, that I can feel like I am getting my feet on stable ground again. The last 5 days, everything feels so scary. Yesterday I spent some time looking at other women’s infertility blogs, I found on more then one occasion, that women were saying that IUI is basically useless and not helpful in the least bit.....doesn’t exactly give me the warm fuzzies…I’ll tell you that much. Are we just throwing our money, our time, our emotions into something that isn’t even going to work? I can’t help but wonder.
I started thinking that maybe we should consider IVF sooner rather then later. So, I brought up the possibility of IVF to hubby last night…well that just caused a huge fight with crying and other craziness. He doesn’t feel we are even ready to start discussing the possibility of IVF. But, I just keep thinking....how many failed IUI’s are we willing to have? How many disappointments? I see the statistics of each…less then 10% with IUI and as high as 60% with IVF. I want to just jump right into the IVF, knowing those statistics. I’m just not sure how many more failed cycles and disappointments I can handle.
After the "blow up," hubby called his best friend to tell him that I'd officially "lost it." I think he was just waiting for me to really lose it. I don't even care....I mean, aren't we infertiles allowed to lose it every once in awhile?
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